What Happened?? Part Deux: Women of the Millennium
Posted on: November 7, 2011
- In: 80sBabies | GrindsMyGears | Lists | Women
- 11 Comments
We’re consumers. Trendsetters. The children of the millennium. Last week I talked about some of the shortcomings of Gen-Y’s young men. It wouldn’t be fair if I didn’t bring up the ladies, right? So here you are, ladies and gents. I present to you my list of road blocks holding our women back in this generation:
Should I just serve it anyway? If he loves me, he'll pretend he doesn't notice how charred his chicken is. =/
They don’t know how to cook. It’s been said that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. This may or may not be true, but I guarantee that your grandmother knew how to throw down in the kitchen. Men don’t need you to be a 5-star chef. Honestly, most of the men I’ve known can’t appreciate a gourmet meal – from the simplest croque monsieur to coq au vin. All they’ll see is a good ham sandwich and marinated chicken. So really ladies, what you need is a few staple dishes that you’re great at making. My mother really doesn’t cook. I learned most of my skills from my dad and then culinary training. But my mother does have a good six or seven recipes in her arsenal that she has mastered. As long as you’re not burning everything, you’ll do just fine. Eating out every night is all well and good [#TWSS], but that gets to be old real quick, especially when your man is footing the bill more often than not.
Rosie wants to work. Cam doesn't.
They can’t take care of themselves. Now don’t get me wrong. There are many amazing, career driven, ‘independent women’ out there kicking asses and taking names out there in the business world. Whether they wanted to or not, they decided to do whatever they needed to do to go to college, purchase a home, buy a car, pay their bills, etc. In these times, women can’t sit around and wait on a man to swoop in and support them. Now that women can enter the workforce and seek equality in all facets of life, we need to step up. I’ve always been taught that I need to have my own money. I would never get caught up in a situation where I relied completely on someone else to keep a roof over my head or pay my bills. But I know too many women my age who spend all their time scheming different ways to get someone else to ‘keep their fine asses in Gucci and gold’. [Name that movie!] Now, if you end up in a relationship or marriage where your SO/husband is wanting to provide for you, that’s fabulous. Kudos to you. But always have a plan in the event that everything doesn’t pan out as you’d hoped. If that relationship fizzles and you get kicked to the proverbial curb, have enough know-how to be able to land on your feet. Women of this generation make careers out of finding sugar daddies, being groupies, and of course, having babies and living off child support. [This is not to say that all women do this, but many of them are.]Which brings me to the last point I’ll be talking about in this post:
They don’t respect their bodies. We, the young ladies of the twenty-first century, are sexually liberated. We’re reaping the benefits of the sexual revolution of the late 1960s and 1970s which introduced the concept that women, just like men, enjoy sex and have sexual needs. That’s great and I’m happy for us. Have all the sex you want – do you. People may judge, but that’s never going to change.
My only issue with all of this sexual freedom is that WE NEED TO BE SMARTER. Men are to blame as well, but I’m focusing on us right now. Three words: Wrap it up. Get Birth Control. Don’t get stuck raising a child by yourself!
[okay, eight very important words at the end there] We need to be educated and take care of our bodies! I’m sure I don’t need to point out the prevalence of STDs out there. And the statistics on single mothers are astounding. Not to mention how young these women are when they first start having sex, and end up pregnant. Babies are still having babies with no signs of slowing down anytime soon. They have so many sexual partners that’s it’s hard to keep track. This generation no longer cares about our reputation. Finding out that none of the thirteen guys you brought on Maury are the father of your baby is not a good look, dear. We need to do better!
Times have changed, I know this. Of course they have! I wouldn’t have wanted to live as a kept woman in the 50s, slaving in the kitchen while barefoot and pregnant. However, there are so many things from that era that are being lost on today’s youth. They had such class, a sense of duty and honor to their families, and pride back then. I feel lucky to have parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles who have passed down these values to me. I always say that I’m an old soul’. Sometimes I wonder if I’d have liked it better if I were born during those times when more people shared the same ideologies as me. I most definitely don’t have all the answers, but hey, this is my blog and I can pretty much write about whatever I’d like. 
Whether you agree or disagree with my lists, I’d still like to hear from you!
Can you think of any other flaws with the today’s young women? Or maybe you believe that today’s women are an improvement from the women of previous generations? Men: Is cooking really that important to you these days? What attributes do you wish more women had nowadays? Women: Are you Chef Boy-ar-deena in the kitchen, or do you need a recipe to boil water? How do you feel about your sexuality? Are you tired or the ‘slutty woman’ double standard?
Talk to me in the comments!
11 Responses to "What Happened?? Part Deux: Women of the Millennium"
November 8, 2011 at 9:27 am
To answer the first question: Cooking is important, and here’s why. When my wife cooks a meal for me, it demonstrates much more than the obvious fact that she needs to eat.
She took the time to clean the food, season it, prepare it, set the table, etc.–and she does all of that as a way of continually demonstrating that she respects me as a man. That is why I believe there is a lost “art” to women and cooking. The art of cooking extends to showing your significant other that you think enough of them to make them a meal and satisfy that basic need.
In regards to what other attributes I wish women had: decisiveness (and that applies to every thing).
Many women, these days, want to be the “independent woman” Beyonce sings about, but also want to be a “kept” woman at the same time. It can’t be both ways. Hell, even Beyonce spoke of being independent, and then in the next damn song was talking about tying a dude’s doo-rag. That’s the other part of the “independent” crap that a lot of Black women aren’t understanding these days (or that’s how it seems from what I hear, read, and see).
Thoughts?
November 8, 2011 at 1:14 pm
I agree that cooking does demonstrate respect for your significant other. I don’t feel like having a meal prepared for your husband when he gets home from work is subservient at all, as some feminists may believe. I certainly appreciate a man that can cook, though.
As far as my thoughts on today’s ‘independent women,’ I can only speak from my own point of view. As you may know, I’ve done a lot for a woman my age, and I’ve done it by myself. I own my house, my car, I travel, have a career, and go to school. I do these things because: a) I like money, and like to maintain my semi-lavish lifestyle, and b) I have the education needed to have done these things. I didn’t necessarily want to be this ‘independent woman,’ but I didn’t have a choice if I was to accomplish the goals I’d set for myself. Real talk, I wanted to be married when I was 19. My ideal job: rich housewife. I would loooove to be a kept woman, but that’s unrealistic in these times.
As I’ve said before, I would be ecstatic if I could find a man who was ambitious, succesful, and a leader. I would be happy to take on my role as his wife and support him.
November 8, 2011 at 3:49 pm
can i point something out?
i’ll take your silence as a yes.
in part 1 you addressed things boys in this next generation need to do in order to better themselves period. it seems like in part 2 you listed things these girls need to do in relation to men. i.e.- cooking, sex…. just an observation.
as far as cooking if a woman tells me she can’t cook i’ll side eye her. not that i’m expecting you to cook for me (i can handle that myself) but if we end up getting married i don’t want the sole responsibility of feeding our children to fall on me.
November 9, 2011 at 10:21 pm
Interesting observation, Tunde. When I started writing this post, I was thinking about societal gender roles and whatnot. Things that women used to do, but don’t care to do now. I’m guessing that’s why things turned out the way they did. I originally had another bulletpoint about women needing to stop fighting in public, but I kept it to three things like the previous post.
November 9, 2011 at 4:58 pm
Excellent post.
“Men: Is cooking really that important to you these days? What attributes do you wish more women had nowadays?”
Cooking is and always has been an essential survival skill. When our less evolved ancestors lived in communal societies, the men hunted and gathered, the women prepared the meals and took care of the kids. What can we expect from the millenia woman? We can expect to have a budget enough to keep her belly full in Ruths Chris and watch her waistline grow as a result of eating out all the time. Making a salad with a serving of grilled fish or chicken is just as filling as that steak. Being able to throw together a healthy impromptu meal isn’t hard. You don’t even need cookbooks nowadays with the internet and recipes abound available. Really is no excuse. I learned how to cook from my southern (and single) father who left us as latch key kids most of the time. He either left us ingredients to make our own or food to reheat. Either way, we knew how to. Meeting a woman who cannot or who refuses to cook is like a car with no heat in Michigan. Considering that many of our mothers were great if not good cooks and prepared meals with love and care, we want the same for ourselves and our children if we decided to have some. Childhood obesity is an embarrassing issue and I’m sick of seeing so much of it. Kids shouldn’t be getting diagnosed with diabetes and heart conditions from eating Mcdonalds all the time.
The only other thing I wish modern women would have is environmental awareness or to observe their surroundings. If you are constantly staring at the phone, playing with your phone or talking to your girl, how will you notice the gentleman that was considering sitting next to you to strike up a conversation? Do you really feel safe walking down the street, when you are clearly distracted and cannot see who is coming along side or behind you? If you’re out at a social setting, why are you texting your girl who is sitting at home? Shouldn’t you at least make an attempt at being social and approachable?
November 17, 2011 at 9:52 pm
Women: Are you Chef Boy-ar-deena in the kitchen, or do you need a recipe to boil water?
I’m ok in the kitchen. There are plenty of things I’d like to try and 1 specific thing I must master before my mom takes her recipe to her final resting place. I wish this (cooking) would be a must-have for men as well. i had an ex that would eat out/order in every night. not only is that unhealthy, that is expensive!! plus i have a job that is outside the usual 9-5. you mean that you aren’t eating til 11pm? and i must cook it for you? if im tired, we both dont eat???
How do you feel about your sexuality? Are you tired or the ‘slutty woman’ double standard?
there isn’t enough space to type out this answer. so i’ll say – yes. im tired of the double standard. but it is like the song that never ends, it just keeps going on and on my friend…
November 7, 2011 at 5:27 pm
As I pointed out on SBM earlier today cooking really isn’t all that important to me. I’m going to eat regardless, but it’s definitely worth a few brownie points if a woman knows her way around a kitchen.
As far as what attributes I wish more women had? Well, I’ll just speak of some of the women I dealt with, but being more empathetic and attempt to see both sides of a situation and not just hers. I don’t mind you may disagree, but have some perspective, too. Also, one thing I believe is a lost art is women being able to sew. I’m bias b/c my mom used to/still does sew. We be up in Jo-Ann Fabrics every other weekend when I was little, lol. It appears many women (and men) aren’t able to sew a button, more or less stich up some pants and make an outfit. So yeah, sewing is an awesome skill to have I think…but not a deal breaker, though.
November 8, 2011 at 12:58 pm
I was going to mention sewing, but the post was already getting a little lengthy. I think sewing is a great skill to have. While I don’t make clothes or anything like that, [I made some pajama pants in middle school] I can darn a sock if need be, reinforce buttons, and fix holes. I actually just bought a handheld sewing machine a couple months ago and it is amazing for hemming and fixing seams.
Do schools nowadays still have Home Ec classes? Those classes are honestly what got me interested in being a chef.
November 9, 2011 at 5:02 pm
Indeed…I agree wholeheartedly with sewing. I was actually taught by my father how to mend pants if I ever got a rip or sew on a button (mind you I’m a dude). I actually had to teach someone I was seeing how to sew a button back on her jacket.